


Eleventh

by peachmang0



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2020-08-04
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:41:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25704541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peachmang0/pseuds/peachmang0
Summary: two makes one number; even against the odds
Relationships: Han Jisung | Han/Hwang Hyunjin
Kudos: 31





	Eleventh

Two tidal waves came clashing together, creating a huge disruption in the natural system. Changing the perspective of the entirety around them, baffling them in a series of pure mystification.

They proved that not everything is within the guidance of the norm. Two waves set their own standard, proving that no such thing is insuperable.

𝗙𝗜𝗥𝗦𝗧  
𝘊𝘖𝘕𝘍𝘌𝘚𝘚𝘐𝘖𝘕

"Jin what's up? Did I do something wrong? I swear to god if you say I made a mistake again I assure you, I'm seriously trying my best okay. It's just that my body won't cooperate with me" 

Not gonna lie, I'm suddenly nervous. Hyunjin just pulled me away from the others after practice saying he needs to talk to me about something.

If it's about the dance again, I'm seriously trying my best. He looks so serious from my perspective. Is he really mad at me? Dear God please I don't want to upset him again.

I feel nervous but I also feel fuzzy inside. He was tightly holding my wrist but it's not enough to hurt me, like he was afraid I will break anytime, like a fragile glass.

The next thing I knew we were on the rooftop of the campus. It's our usual hang out place, ours and the others. We often find ourselves huddled in a small circle everytime we have vacant time.

"Jinnie?" I bit my lower lip. Afraid he would say something that I know might upset me in the end. 

He took a deep breath before turning to look at me. I swear I did an inaudible gasp when he turned to look at me straight in the eyes.

His dark eyes pierce through my own as if he could see through my soul. I stared back.

There goes a saying, the eyes are the window to the soul.

If it's true then why does his looks troubled?

"Jisung.." he gripped my wrist tighter. I could feel the pressure but it doesn't really hurt.

"Jinnie you're scaring me" I averted my gaze away from him too scared to look at him. He never calls me by my name, it's either Hannie, Sungie or Ji but never Jisung. 

I bit my lower lip again and this time I could feel my teeth sinking on the flesh probably bruising it in the process and making it bleed.

"Look at me" he grabbed my chin and made me look at his eyes again. His dark eyes convey some sort of softness in them. 

"Hyu-"

"I like you"

Three words that left me breathless. 

"O-of course you like me. W-we're best friends" I stuttered.

Please don't make me misinterpret it. I don't want to keep my hopes up. Don't be so cruel to me.

I like him. I like him a lot. I know I shouldn't be. I never shouldn't like my best friend, it's wrong, it's... out of the norm.

I can't like my best friend let alone a boy. What will the society say?

But I didn't want to listen to what they have to say, I don't want to listen to them. I don't want to follow the system.

No one can tell me what I should be and what I should do. I'm the holder of my life not them, not anyone else. I like him, I like a boy, I like my best friend. Who cares?

But I'm not ready for this, I'm not ready for a heartbreak.

"No hannie that's not what I mean" I stared at him confused.

"Wha-"

"I like you. I like 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 you. In a romantic way. I want you to be mine"

He smiled. That beautiful smile of his. I love the way he smiles, the way his eyes crinkled to crescents, that beautiful and sincere smile of his.

"I like you too" 

𝗦𝗘𝗖𝗢𝗡𝗗  
𝘍𝘐𝘙𝘚𝘛 𝘋𝘈𝘛𝘌

"Can I please have a Hyunjin too?" I could feel the pout in Felix's tone. I can't help but to giggle at my other best friend.

"Find your own lix, he's mine" I said through my phone. Felix called me once we arrived in the hotel where we'd be staying for a week long vacation.

"Yeah yeah" he's animatedly rolling his eyes at me, I could feel it all the way here.

"Why did it took you guys so long to have your first date in the first place? Are you two seriously dating?" Now it's me who can't help but to roll my eyes at him.

"We are dating, you egg" 

"HEY! I said let's forget about that!" Felix shrieked and I could hear a faint, "We'll never gonna let that go" in the background. It's definitely Seungmin's voice. I suddenly miss my roommates even though I saw them yesterday before leaving.

"What Seungmin said" it was a very interesting memory. The history of Felix and the egg.

"Going back!" riling Felix is mine and Seungmin's favorite thing to do. But we never over step our boundaries. If Felix quieted down then it's time for us to stop.

"We were all busy with school works lix, have you forgotten how the four of us would spend nights together reviewing for the semestral exams? Grades are our priority, dates could wait"

I heard a low giggle from my left and looked to see Hyunjin giggling as he stares at me, I playfully rolled my eyes at him then gestured him to keep quiet, he nodded and animatedly zipped his lips.

"I'm jealous of the both of you. I mean your first date is out of the country. How great is that"

Well having a rich boyfriend does have its perks. Well we both have our own money, I got mine from my parents since they give me money every week and I also have a part time job with Felix and Seungmin for extra cash.

I know it's not needed but I also want to be like normal college students who get to work and pay for their own expenses.

Hyunjin's also rich. Being the son of a CEO of a clothing brand is a huge advantage but he's not the snobby rich type of person.

"We were just lucky we saved up for our trip" it's true though, it's our saving which we spent to buy plane tickets and book a hotel for our one week semestral break.

"Savings my ass, you both are rich enough to travel anytime you want" he's just bitter because we didn't take him and Seungmin to our trip.

They were both back in Korea so he's bitter. Seungmin brought Felix with him to his hometown since Felix's family lives in Australia and he's too lazy to book a plane ticket.

Hyunjin must've felt bored listening to our conversation as he lay his head on my lap. I instinctively caressed his head, feeling his soft hair gets tangled on my fingers.

He let out a satisfied hum and I reached for his face placing quick pecks on his forehead, nose and cheeks. 

I'm still holding my phone to my ear as Felix was still blabbering about something which I couldn't really understand as I'm occupied at the moment.

Hyunjin reached for my face, pulling me even closer to his face. He too placed quick pecks on my nose, cheeks, on my chin and at the corner of my lips. I can't help but to giggle, I'm quite ticklish and the way he kisses me feels light and feathery.

"Eww are you guys seriously doing the nasty while on the phone?! Gross! I don't need to know what you're doing so I'm hanging up, give me chocolates as compensation. Bye!"

And he hangs up. Both me and Hyunjin giggled. I could imagine Felix's red face, how does cherry lix sounds like?

I lay down beside him, enjoying the comfortable silence and the warmth he's radiating. I closed my eyes as they suddenly feel heavy.

I'm so lucky to have him. I could get used to this.

𝗧𝗛𝗜𝗥𝗗  
𝘍𝘈𝘝𝘖𝘙𝘐𝘛𝘌 𝘔𝘖𝘔𝘌𝘕𝘛

"Jisung hyung, Hyunjin hyung won't stop bothering me!!" it was Jeongin's voice who called out to me. He's my childhood friend, I knew him ever since they moved from Busan and since then, he's like a brother to me.

"What is it now?" We were at innie's house. The three of us often spend time together along with Felix and Seungmin but my other two best friends were unfortunately busy. Felix with his Korean lessons and Seungmin having a council meeting with the other student council committee.

"I hope your drink spills" innie is a sweet child but he gets savage when he wants to.

"Hyung, Hyunjin hyung won't stop singing his americano song. I think my ears will bleed anytime if I hear it one more time" jeongin whined as I sat beside him.

"Americanoooo~"

And to tease Jeongin more, Hyunjin didn't stop singing.

I could only shake my head at how childish my boyfriend acts. He's the older one but he tends to be childish at times. But I don't mind, he's cute.

"Am- AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!"

His shriek startled both me and Jeongin. He abruptly stood as he looked at the both of us with wide eyes.

"This was my favorite shirt!!" He dramatically leaned on the wall. I could see jeongin laughing at his misery and I can't help but to roll my eyes at him.

How dramatic can your boyfriend be?

𝗙𝗢𝗨𝗥𝗧𝗛  
𝘔𝘈𝘋𝘌 𝘏𝘐𝘔 𝘍𝘈𝘓𝘓 𝘍𝘖𝘙 𝘏𝘐𝘔

"Do you know how beautiful Hyunjin's smile is?" 

Felix groaned.

"Sung don't take it the wrong way okay? Yes I know Hyunjin's smile is beautiful but you already said that FIVE times already. Tell something I don't know" I pouted at Felix. 

"You're no fun lix" he rolled his eyes. "Speaking of which, where's your boyfriend anyway?" It's just me and lix right now. Hyunjin needs to take kkami to a vet, I was supposed to go with him but he insist that I don't since we both know I'm allergic to furs. 

"He's taking kkami to a vet" Felix lazily nodded as the both of us were in front of the TV flipping through different channels here and there.

Seungmin unfortunately has another council meeting so it's just me and my twin.

We then agreed to watch a movie and during half of the movie, Felix dozed off.

I turned to look at him and patted his head. Memories came crashing all of a sudden.

How the two of us accidentally met fighting over the last carton of strawberry milk.

After that, we became friends and unexpectedly became attached to the hip.

I turned my attention back to the movie we were watching, I tried to focus but my mind kept wandering elsewhere.

I could vividly see Hyunjin's smile. The way his lips curled upwards, his perfect teeth showing and the way his eyes crinkled to crescents.

That's one of the reason why I fell for him. His smile was the brightest, the sincerest, the purest. I can't help but to fall in love with him over and over again.

I suddenly feel something vibrating on my pockets. It's my phone. I looked to see who texted me. It's Hyunjin.

𝗛𝘆𝘂𝗻𝗷𝗶𝗻: I miss you :((

I chuckled. Being sad doesn't suit him. He needs to smile more.

𝗠𝗲: I miss you more <3

𝗙𝗜𝗙𝗧𝗛  
𝘍𝘈𝘝𝘖𝘙𝘐𝘛𝘌 𝘗𝘏𝘖𝘛𝘖

"I told you it would be cold. Why didn't you bring a coat with you?" He only grinned at me.

"It slipped my mind" I rolled my eyes at him.

All nine of us were out together. Minho hyung suggested we should go to a skating rink even though it's already cold. I refused at first but Hyunjin begged me to go.

I just wanted to sleep in our dorms or maybe cuddle with my boyfriend but said boyfriend was evil enough to destroy my perfect plan of staying indoors.

We finally arrived at the skating rink and it was seriously cold.

I turned to side glare the one behind this hang out. Minho hyung, Felix, Changbin hyung, Seungmin and Jeongin were already in the rink. Chan hyung and woojin hyung were at the corner hesitant to even step inside.

I turned to look at my boyfriend who was shivering from the cold. "I told you to bring one" he turned to me and suddenly he snuggled inside my coat.

He hugged me and I shivered at how cold his body was. I hugged him tighter, my body was surprisingly warm and he snuggled closer. 

I was so lost in him that I didn't notice Seungmin was behind me.

"Not everyone has a boyfriend" I turned around to look at him then Hyunjin whined at the loss of warmth.

I turned to see Seungmin holding a camera in his hand with a teasing smile on his face.

I'll seriously get that photo later.

𝗦𝗜𝗫𝗧𝗛  
𝘐 𝘓𝘖𝘝𝘌 𝘠𝘖𝘜

"Hannie.." I turned to look at Hyunjin.

We were stargazing. It's already 2 am but neither of us want to sleep.

"I love you"

My heart skipped a beat. It's a first.

We haven't said our 'i love yous' before. For me, it's enough that he makes me feel loved and vice versa. They say actions speak louder than words and I believe that.

"I love you too" I said it back.

He turned away and covered his face.

"Yahh! Are you blushing? Are you seriously embarrassed right now?"

He's so cute.

Getting embarrassed after saying he loves me, my boyfriend is an actual cutie.

"I love you over and over again" I whispered against the crook of his neck. I felt his arms wrapped around my waist. I tangled my arms around his neck and snuggled deeper on his neck, my lips faintly brushed against his ear which earned a giggle from him.

I don't want this moment to end.

𝗦𝗘𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗛  
𝘔𝘖𝘔𝘌𝘕𝘛 𝘛𝘖𝘎𝘌𝘛𝘏𝘌𝘙

"You know we could get arrested if we took a photo with the Eiffel tower" Hyunjin's head snapped towards me, a look of horror present on his face.

"Seriously!?" He asked dramatically. I giggled at his reaction. "I'm just kidding" he pouted at me. I kissed his nose much to his complain.

"Yah you can't just kiss me like that after you almost made me believe we'll get arrested. I was planning to take a photo with you with the Eiffel tower even" he continued to pout.

"Stop pouting babe, I was just joking" he held my hand, intertwining our fingers together.

"You're lucky I love you" my heart skipped a beat again. Him saying he loves me never gets old for me.

"Thank you for taking me here. It was one of my dreams to go to Paris and now, it's much more memorable since I'm here with the love of my life" he gripped my hand tighter and smiled at me.

That very same smile which made me fall for him.

"I'll do anything for you"

𝗘𝗜𝗚𝗛𝗧𝗛  
𝘍𝘐𝘙𝘚𝘛 𝘒𝘐𝘚𝘚

I pulled Hyunjin away from the peering eyes of our nosy friends.

The nine of us were together again, but at the beach this time and they just made me buy them drinks to which I greatly complained.

How in the world would I carry nine drinks??

Well plastic bags exist, Han Jisung.

And so I grabbed Hyunjin's wrist and dragged him away from the rest. He's my boyfriend so he must help me with my suffering.

"Hannie slow down, the drinks won't go away" I heard him chuckle.

"But we must hurry to get this done as soon as possible" I whined at him. Seriously why me of all people? It could be chan hyung for all I know, he's much larger than I am. Why do I have to buy them the drink? I didn't lose any bet.

"You're pouting" I heard him say. I pouted even more. 

We were looking at different stalls by the beach and I'm seriously getting dizzy, the sun doesn't help at all.

"Slow down baby" his pace slowed down automatically making me slow down too.

"Let's go somewhere, I feel like the sun is glaring at me and it makes me dizzy" and that's where we found ourselves under the shade of a coconut tree.

"Won't the coconut fall on our heads?" I rolled my eyes at him. "It will if you continue thinking about it" he also rolled his eyes at me.

I leaned on the trunk of the tree, too exhausted from continuously walking. Hyunjin was an arm away from me, looking at me fondly.

I stared at him. The light from the sun just makes his skin look golden. He looks so ethereal.

"Ji?" He titled his head as he look at me worriedly. "Are you still dizzy?" He sounds worried. I shook my head.

"I don't feel dizzy anymore" he nodded but he doesn't look convinced.

"Shou-"

I didn't let him finish what he was about to say when I pulled his face towards me and our lips meeting in the process.

I had both my hands holding the nape of his neck, my thumb gracing his cheeks as I pulled him closer to deepen our kiss.

He had one arm securely trapping me against the tree and the other resting on my waist.

It was our first kiss and it was true that when you had your first kiss with the person you love, it feels like there's an explosion of different kinds of fireworks when both your lips meet. 

His lips feels soft like how I imagined it to be. I could feel him grinning against my lips. His arm which was previously trapping me against the tree moved and now is behind my neck.

It feels like a dream. And if this was a dream, I don't wanna wake up anymore.

Seconds passed and we pulled away from each other, catching our breaths from kissing without a stop and on my case, he's always left me breathless.

I could still feel his lips on mine, I bit my lower lip as I finally came off my high. Heat rushed towards my cheeks. I suddenly want to hide.

Hyunjin giggled as he might've noticed I suddenly turned embarrassed. He leaned again and for the second time, our lips meet.

~

"Where are the drinks?!" Minho hyung exclaimed. We looked at each other and I could feel myself blushing again upon remembering what we did a while ago.

"You guys are hopeless. Come on Changbin let's buy it ourselves" Minho hyung stood and facepalmed.

"Oh and ji, please put a concealer on your neck. Not everyone needs to know what happened, thank you very much"

Hyunjin laughed along with the others. If cherry lix exists then cherry sung just arrived.

I hit Hyunjin's chest earning a groan from him. Serves him right, I told him not to do it in the first place but he won't listen.

𝗡𝗜𝗡𝗧𝗛  
𝘈𝘉𝘖𝘜𝘛 𝘏𝘐𝘔

"Hannie tell me something about me that you can't forget" 

"The mole under your eye"

"Why?"

"It's your greatest asset aside from your personality. Your laugh too but I love your mole the best"

"Why?"

"Because everytime I stare at it, I feel like I'm getting lost when I stare at it for too long"

𝗧𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗛  
𝘔𝘐𝘚𝘚 𝘏𝘐𝘔

"Do you miss him?"

"There wasn't a day where I don't miss him"

𝗘𝗟𝗘𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗛

"Who walked away?"

"Guess what? It's him"

~

"Hyunjin please t-tell me what did I do?" I took his hand. I don't want to let him go.

"It's not you, Jisung"

A stab in the heart. It's been so long since I last heard that name from him.

"Jinnie please. D-don't leave me" 

He shook my hand but I don't want to let go.

"Jisung stop. I don't want to hurt you even more"

"You're already hurting me... don't go please"

"I- let's fix it please"

"Love please.."

"Hyunjin..."

"I'm sorry Jisung"

I couldn't see clearly with the tears continuously flowing down my eyes. It's blurry but I could see his back, turned against me.

He walked away.

I feel empty.

Jisung. The three times he called me Jisung. One when we first met, two when he confessed and three when he walked away.

𝗧𝗪𝗘𝗟𝗙𝗧𝗛  
𝘏𝘜𝘙𝘛

"Does it still hurt?"

"If I said no, will you believe me?"

~

"Sungie please open the door. Talk to us please"

"..."

"Ji there's food outside your door"

"..."

"Sungie, me and Minnie will be going to uni. Take care okay? There's food outside your door"

"..."

"Ji your mom called, she said she's worried. Please open the door for us"

"..."

"Hi Jisungie hyung, it's me, innie. Hyung I almost failed a test but don't worry I still managed to get through it!! I miss you hyung"

"..."

"Ji, it's your Minho hyung and Woojin hyung. We left your favorite cheesecake. We miss you"

"..."

"Hey squirrel, it's your Changbin hyung. I miss you"

"..."

"Sungie, it's your chan hyung. Please open the door for us. We're worried. Everyone's restless, Felix and Seungmin are very worried. They'd breakdown in front of us. Innie misses you. We miss you. Please open the door"

"..."

"Baby.. it's your eomma. Please come out, eomma wants to see her baby squirrel. I love you baby. Please let eomma in. Let me take care of you"

The sound of the knob unlocking was heard all throughout the dorm.

"Oh my baby.. I'm so s-sorry"

Jisung's mom rushed inside and saw the state of her only son. He looks pale, paler than normal, his eyes looks so distant, he looks thinner and his once full cheeks looks so hollow.

Felix and Seungmin fall on their knees once they saw Jisung's state. Woojin and Chan immediately picked up the two boys, hugging them and comforting them, saying reassuring words while also trying to reassure themselves.

Minho hugged both Jeongin and Changbin as the youngest almost faints upon the sight of the person who he considers his brother.

Jisung could only stare at the mass of people inside his room while his mom cradles him in her arms. He felt lifeless, they were all crying but Jisung doesn't have any tears to shed anymore.

Even his tears left him.

𝗧𝗛𝗜𝗥𝗧𝗘𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗛  
𝘔𝘌𝘚𝘚𝘈𝘎𝘌

Hey how are you? I guess you're doing fine without me. I'm proud of you, even when you don't feel the same towards me.

I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough to make you stay. I'm sorry if I wasn't enough for you to stay.

I thought you love me but I guess I was wrong. Love isn't always a reason for someone to stay, it's not enough that you only love each other.

Thank you for the memories. I never felt this happy before. Thank you for everything.

𝗙𝗢𝗨𝗥𝗧𝗘𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗛  
𝘓𝘖𝘝𝘌

"Do you still love him?"

"I never stopped and will never stop"

~

July 14, 2020

𝗛𝘆𝘂𝗻𝗷𝗶𝗻: I miss you

𝗛𝘆𝘂𝗻𝗷𝗶𝗻: I miss you a lot

~

I love you but it doesn't mean I'm ready to accept you back.

**Author's Note:**

> thank u sm for taking the time to read this fic 😊 it's inspired by the Make It Hurt edits in Twitter 😊😌 u can find the vid reference on my pinned ✨
> 
> [ Twitter](https://twitter.com/hwngsxng?s=09)


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